“You will not fulfill your destiny until you let go of the illusion of control”


Having an obsession of wanting to control everything is like a disease, it can stress you out, and it will almost always lead to you being a lonely and unsuccessful person. Being in control is just an illusion, it doesn’t really exist, and it’s just a feeling that you feel when things are going the way you want them to, go based on your ego.

Having Control Only Feeds Your Ego

When you try to control situations and circumstances that you can’t foresee, whether in your business, in your relationships, or in any other area of your life, you will get stressed out. The reason most people try to control the uncontrollable is because they believe it’s the only way situations will work out right . Guess what, it’s actually not true, and nobody can control any situation. When you try to control situations, you will only be doing harm to yourself as it will stress you when things stop working out the way you planned. This is a huge reason why many marriages and businesses fail because one person thinks they know the “right” way of doing something, even though there are actually thousands of ways of getting one thing done. But the best way is to go with the flow, make decisions when your heart is in it and not your logical mind. The next time you find yourself fighting with someone on how to do something “right”, try to take a step back, drop the ego, and realize that your way may not be the only way.

Control Isn’t All Bad

The only type of control you should be practicing is self-control. You are the only person you can control, so instead of focusing on what might happen, and trying to control the future, focus on controlling yourself so that you can become a more successful individual. When you focus on bettering yourself, your entire ego goes out the window because you’re not comparing yourself to others and you’re not trying to change things you cannot change. You should be focused on how you can be a more determined person, how you can be more loving towards your loved ones, and what you did wrong in certain situations; this is something you can control.

Faith Is The Only Way To Get Where You Want To Be

This is the only way to get where you want to be. Although you don’t see how things are going to turn out, trying to control the invisible is insanity. The only way to have situations work out in your life whatever they may be, is to have faith that everything will happen the right way in the end, without you trying to control what’s going to happen along the way. Since control is just an illusion, focus on taking charge of your own life, so that you can better yourself, and leave the uncontrollable to faith. Having complete faith will ease your mind, let you relax and you will be able to enjoy the journey as your successful life unfolds right in front of you.

Total Control is an Illusion

There, I said it. Accept it and move on. You are not in total control of anything at all. You can have some control of some things, but total control is not achievable. Take these examples: you are not in total control of your own mind. If you were, then you would not think of a pink elephant when I tell you not to think of a pink elephant, but I can bet you money that you did think of one. You are not in total control of the way you feel. If you were, then you could just stop being anxious and stop worrying about everything right now and never be anxious again. And, you are not in total control of your behaviors. If you were, then you could stop blinking your eyes while being awake for the next 5 hours.

So, we are not in total control of our own feelings, thoughts, and behaviors, therefore there is no way we will be in control of anyone else’s thoughts, feelings and behaviors either. Total control is an illusion.


Written by: Kamran Gulhassan

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