Defining a crush: Impossible.

How would one define a crush? A gleeful tingling of the senses upon the smallest thought of a person? A tickling sensation in your inner vitals? An impossible hope that leads you on paths more treacherous than any tread before? Perhaps a state of lucidity found only in the middle ground between dreams and consciousness? Maybe an illusion dictated by a temporary upsurge in hormones? Quite possibly, perhaps certainly and most probably a wondrous combination of all of these things and much more. Simply put, truly a feeling like none other any mortal can know.

Is this the end?”

Let’s start with a tale, after all, who doesn’t love tales except, well, tyrannical kings and spiteful beggars with spooky curses at their disposal. Say you are en-route to the market, perhaps to buy some groceries or swords (or whatever comes in between) and you see a maiden fairer than any you’ve ever seen before with an aura and charm that drives you into a frenzy of bliss or kink (if that’s what you’re into). Basically, she’s everything you’re not and so out of your league, that you need to beg Elon Musk to hook you up with one of those mindbogglingly sweet flying cars to even stand a chance. But no, you refuse to believe that’s the case so you head to the nearest mirror to polish your ‘looks’ (granted you actually have any) and the not so sudden and not so surprising realization sinks in, she’s way out of your league. Your prospects look bleaker than they ever did, which is impressive given they were non existent to begin with. Despite ALL OF THIS, despite the realization you’re never actually gonna get what you want and despite knowing that this is nothing you can actually achieve even if you slay the dragon, traverse the valley of death and obtain the heart of a snow golem, but in spite all of this I’ll be damned if it isn’t the best feeling in the whole wide world. And it’s never an active sort of feeling, it’s a passive one. Like giggling like a retard at their smallest thought even when doing the most mundane of tasks, wondering how happy you get by just one smile of theirs and daydreaming of everything you would do if only you had the chance. That’s the whole promise and allure of it all. A crush is as Illogical, ill advised and incomprehensible as it seemingly gets (for all the logicians out there) and yet, there’s nothing like just staring at someone with wondrous awe, being absolutely encapsulated by their sheer beauty.


“Pictured: A person’s insides when seeing his crush.”

Lust; a distant comparison.

There’s always a well defined boundary between lust and crushes, a crush being not only pure but also well wishing, lust on the other hand being vile and destructive by its very nature. As inevitable as it may be, lust and crushes have a few characteristics which go hand in hand. Lust is an expansion of one’s basic desires and leads one to darker places of their own selves, it leads them to parts of themselves which had, until then, been a mystery to even their own selves hidden behind impervious walls by their own conscience. Lust is characterized by obsessiveness, over possessiveness and confining behaviours. Lust causes pain and longing, it gives the illusion of hope where there is none and gives an even bigger illusion of consent where there is none. Lust is destructive, it drives one to want without recourse and it keeps on driving you to an end point, however hideous it may be, until you finally get there and realize that you want even more the next time you get there again. This heinous cycle keeps on endlessly repeating itself till there is nothing left but bones and flesh of a hollowed human being devoid of the very things that define us as a human. In other words; a ferocious and blood thirsty monster waiting for it’s next prey.


                       “You haven’t seen any fair maidens around, have you?”                  


Crushes; bliss.

In contrast, crushes are like the seedling of the enormous and bountiful tree of love, the very start of a breathtakingly swirling rainbow and a tower, winding and complex as the very structure of love itself. Crushes are characterized by the very best sort of shallow attachment, a euphoria of immense proportions and surprisingly, rebellion. Rebellion not only against one’s self, rebellion against one’s principles, one’s methods, rules and ideologies. They’re the ‘ifs’ and the ‘buts’ of all your negativities, your gripes and reservations. They’re your muse, your epiphany, your inspiration and your model of goodness, however illusioned or false it may be. It is undeniable that you strive to become a better person in their eyes when you have a crush and any sort of good that comes in your world is well worth it, no matter what the source. As for how a crush feels like; it’s not just a mesmerizing melody but rather a masterful symphony crafted with all the care in world hitting every perfect note. It’s not just a temporary feeling of short lived happiness but rather a constant, fuzzy feeling of absolute bliss. It’s not an addiction always leaving you wanting more but rather a euphoria inducing high with no repercussions whatsoever. It’s not just an illusion characterized by hormonal spikes (that’s lust) but rather a demandless covenant to which ultimate loyalty is pledged with no hope of any returns. It’s not a seed you just planted but rather a fruit producing offshoot that isn’t yours to grow. Call it nonsensical, call it foolish, useless, childish, idiotic, silly or even impractical but given the nature of a crush, that serves only to add to the beauty of the situation. Trust me, don’t expect anyone else to even remotely understand your feelings because it’s the ultimate gray area of logic, it’s just pure want characterized by innocence and chastity. Most people these days think their lust is a ‘crush’ and it really is a surprise given how distinctively differing they both can be, as discussed above.


                               “Maybe they’re both day? Close call really.”



The only appropriate way to express such an influx of feelings is by terming it ‘cute’ because that’s what, in a single word, a crush is. Obviously, such a state cannot be restricted by bounding it to one word, trust me, I’ve written a whole article on it without really getting there, but if there was a synonym for what crushes are, it would probably be cute. It has always been assumed by the brooding geniuses that a person has to be at a certain level of foolishness, immaturity or childishness to feel something like this. After all, how else can you explain feeling something so inexplicably intimate? However, despite all the odds, I’ve seen, rather ironically, the conventional wisdom fall flat on its heels when it comes to crushes.

The sheer intensity of this feeling truly deserves a credit of its own because it really is a feeling like no other, as mentioned before. It’s a feeling which makes you forsake your standards and ego in pursuit of an impossible dream, a feeling that keeps you up at night daydreaming of illusions cooked up in your mind, a feeling that shows you a rosy garden in midst of a barren desert, a feeling which ignites a fire capable of thawing and melting even the frostiest ice, a feeling that hypnotizes, mesmerizes and desensitizes you in the eeriest ways possible and alas! A feeling which makes the world go round and round and round…

              “Arrows indicate crushes (for those of you lazy farts who skipped to the end).”                    source

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  1. A very interesting read Hassaan! I followed your fantastical chain of thought till the very end. You’re not afraid of getting carried away and that’s always good with writers.

  2. kasar koi aya tha mri bakhya gali main
    dekha to griban ka thakana he nhi tha

    Sochta Hon Mohabbat Se Kinara Kar Lon,
    Dil Ko Begana-E-Targheeb-O-Tamana Kar Lon,
    Sochta Hon K Mohabbat Hai Janoon-E-Ruswa,
    Chand Be Kaar Se Be Hooda Khayalon Ka Hajoom,
    Aik Aazad Ko Paband Banane Ki Havas,
    Aik Begane Ko Apnane Ki Sai Mohoom,

  3. “A feeling which ignites a fire capable of thawing and melting even the frostiest ice”

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